24th Birthday Redux

     I have always been big on celebrations and was never (and will never be be) the type to see birthdays as "just another day". Nothing makes me happier than planning a surprise for someone or finding the perfect gift that I just know their going to love... I think I often get more excited to watch someone open a gift than they are to be opening it. That being the case I used to be rather keyed up for my own birthday as it drew near. Now, however it is awkward at best. A few years ago, on the day before my birthday, my Papa (Grandpa) passed away and it has been bittersweet (if not just plain bitter) ever since. I know in my heart he would want me to be happy and celebrate like I did every year before that, but celebrating only serves to remind me of his absence. I miss him dearly and the days leading up to my birthday no longer hold excited anticipation, instead I tend to be increasingly out of sorts.

     That being the case, when this past birthday rolled around I did what any self-respecting woman does... I sent mixed messages to my dear husband. Not intentionally of course. I didn't know if I was ready to be celebratory again or not. I lamented about how I just didn't want to have a birthday at all anymore, but secretly hoped that there would be some mini-celebrating going on. He of course was incredibly sweet and did the best he could to be sensitive to my emotional state while still showing me that he remembered the special day and was happy to have me around (who doesn't love a man who comes home with chocolate??), but I ruined the night with my sour mood.

     Then comes Christmas and what do I get in my stocking? A coupon for a second birthday celebration!!! Seriously, how awesome is that!!?!! So Sunday night he drives the baby to my folks house while I got all dolled up and once he returned we went out to the most amazing dinner I've had in... well, a very long time. Afterward, despite his distaste for dark, creepy movies he took me to see Black Swan, which I have to say was awesome! I knew almost nothing about it before we entered the theater except that it was supposed to be a pretty intense thriller about ballerinas. It was devastatingly beautiful. Sad, creepy and inspiring all at the same time. I'm definitely a sucker for psychological thrillers. Jason of course wasn't a fan, but we both knew that would likely be the case going in as it is not his type of film, but he he was extremely gracious and didn't begrudge my choice at all.

     The best part of the evening though was that in spite of the tried and true "movie and dinner" routine it felt like it was all brand new again, like we had just met and were getting to know each other. I guess in a sense that's really what we were doing. We have both been changing and growing so much this past year that it was as if we each had a whole new dimension to ourselves to share and discover together. No, marriage is not what we thought it would be when we were young dreaming of our future with nothing to base our expectations on but Hollywood's myths, but there is something so much better about falling in love with your husband all over again over a simple dinner than exhausting yourself trying to recreate an elaborate romantic comedy montage. There's something deeper and much more real about loving someone in spite of, and sometimes even because of, their imperfections and not because of their lack thereof.

Dress - H&M
Scarf - Denise's (gift from my wonderful Mom)
Shimmery footless tights - Can't remember (Kohls I think)
Ankle Boots - Also a gift from my Mom
Earrings - Kohls
Bracelet - Thrifted (it's actually a necklace)
Also, it's not pictured very well due to poor lighting conditions but I rocked my new Buttercupcake eyeshadow from Sugarpill's Burning Heart palette that I just got in! I'm in love!

Oh, and as if he hadn't earned enough bonus points with the second birthday coupon, during dinner Jason handed me a gift bag containing a print out of a QR code that upon scanning with my Evo (which was my Christmas gift) took me to this beauty from Blue Anchor Jewelry!!

He ordered the very last one they had and it should be on it's way to me soon!
Can you say spoiled!?!!



What's your favorite birthday memory? I'd love to hear about it!

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